Action Required to achieve your dreams. It starts NOW.

Last weekend during my meditation I was guided to do an exercise to help myself move forward in the direction of my dream of being an author. Many of us have dreams we carry in our hearts but hold back on pursuing, for a variety of reasons. Mostly, we talk ourselves out of them. In this post I am sharing both the process I was guided to use to become unstuck, and my own answers, which makes me feel very vulnerable. I hope in sharing my truth it will help someone release their own junk and get moving in the direction of their dreams, whatever those are.

Sit quietly with a piece of paper and a pen. Open yourself up to your deepest fears about whatever is weighing on your heart in regards to that thing you are not doing, but want to do, (your dream). Then write down those fears (no one ever needs to see them except you).

9/12/2021 Fears About Writing my Book

dying with the words still in me

not making a difference, not mattering

not fulfilling my purpose

running out of time

not having anything unique to say

not being a success at writing

not being good enough to call myself an author

not making an impact with my book

not being able to do it

doing it wrong, so I am afraid to start

taking the wrong path with my words

no one will read what I write

missing the point

criticism

ridicule

rejection

Now once those are released and out where you can read and acknowledge them, sit with them for a minute. Just breathe. How do they make you feel? In my case, I see they are holding me back from giving it my all, from trying, from starting.

The next step is to acknowledge you are holding your self back with those negative thoughts. You are self-sabotaging. Our thoughts have power, and until we begin to fuel our own self-esteem with positive thoughts, we will stay stuck/safe. Become your own best cheerleader and change those inner thoughts around. With your pen and paper, open yourself up to support from the universe, imagine all the words you need to hear are pouring into you. Write them down, without judgment or editing.

9/12/2021 Affirmations that support my dream of writing my book

I have something to say

My words will resonate

I am good enough

I can do this

I am an author

I know exactly where to begin

My story is worth telling

I can make a difference

I am open to receive direct support and guidance

I am ready

The time is now

It is my time to shine

Again, sit with your written affirmations, and reread them. How do they make you feel? Better? We hope so. Do this exercise whenever you need to acknowledge and release the things that hold you back. Change the negative thoughts to positive, and believe in yourself again, as we do. Do this over and over again, as needed.

I was then guided to write these words:

You cannot help others until you help yourself. Speak your truth, share your wisdom, and lead by example. The time is now. You can do this, surround yourself with those who believe in you—and begin within for that support. You are your own worst critic. You hold yourself back out of fear of failure. You can totally do this. Believe in the power of you. You will make a difference. Be your own best cheerleader and make the time & space to begin moving forward toward your dream. There is time, the time is now, stop distracting yourself by helping others reach for their dreams. It is your turn. Begin within. ♥

If you, like me, are a work-in-progress, this will be helpful whenever I am feeling stuck. I plan to reread my journal whenever I feel those negative, self-sabotaging thoughts about my writing creeping their way back in. And while I am still feeling supported and inspired, I will write.

Namaste.

Yes, you. Every time you sign up for an event, or come to a workshop to reconnect with yourself, or try a new pose in my yoga class, you inspire me. And you teach me, too. Yes, really you do. I would not be half the person I am today if it weren't for the lessons you have taught me.

Thank you.

For your courage, your sass, your strength, your curiosity, your creativity, and your super inspiring belief in yourself.

I love that you aren't afraid to change directions mid-plan, to acknowledge you changed your mind, to try new things even if they feel awkward, to shine your light as bright as you can even in the face of criticism from others, to fly your freak flag without worry of what others will think, to make mistakes and still rise up strong after them. Watching you grow, change, and evolve into the best "you", the real you, gives me the strength to keep searching for the real me.

You give me the courage to shine my light as bright as I can and to let go of the need to dim it when others feel threatened by its brilliance. 

I have the luxury of not only following my heart and making a living at it, but I also get to be inspired and motivated by super cool people every time I step on my mat or open the doors to the studio. How can you not be influenced by watching others grow, change and create forward + positive motion?

Some days I am bursting with pride like a mama hen as I watch my chicks grow and evolve into their true and happiest selves. 

Life is truly good.

Many people speak of happiness as if it is a destination. They think, I'll be happy when....only the "when" never actually materializes because something else always seems to take its place. (Kind of like everyone thinking that when their kids grow up and don't need day care anymore there will be extra money to landscape the yard, or get a new car or...."whatever",  and all the parents out there know that doesn't actually happen.) The money just goes to other "stuff" kids require, like piano lessons, karate memberships, sports equipment, clothes, shoes, phones, etc.

In the past I have been guilty of that kind of future thinking.  The "I will feel so much more organized when I do this, or when I am finally finished with this committee I will be able to start on that." Only the time never actually arrives, there are always more commitments, more things on the to do list, more distractions. And suddenly you wake up one day and you realize that years went by and you don't remember them. Who knew that what I was really doing was wishing away my happiness in the present, for a future time when I might be happy if...?

The notion that I will find happiness "someday" if I just do this, turned out to be a crock for me, a white lie I told myself to feel better, to motivate me and to push me forward. The truth is, I should have just been proud of the things I did accomplish, (without the if onlys added onto them) and let myself be open to enjoying the moment. I should have added some spontaneity.

I wish now for a ton of time back, do overs, to when my boys were little, when my body was able to do more and recover faster, when I could remember things. I want the chance to do it better. I could have spent that time making the most excellent memories with my boys, before they grew into men and no longer wanted time with me, instead of doing all those things that made me feel like I was of value by the amount that I accomplished. Or how clean my house was.

Question of the Week #30: Are You Accomplishing Your Life Away?

In the end, what did I really do anyway, except have a clean house-- that no one even remembers? Myself included. (And the truth is they got messed up the next day anyway!)

I still lie to myself. I still think if I got that new computer, I could begin to write the book I feel driven to write. I could start fresh and keep it all organized. If I cleaned the piles of papers and unearthed the hundreds of previously started posts I have on my notepads, I could fill my blog with additional, engaging content.

Even after all my research on happiness and purpose, meaning and fulfillment, I wonder why I still feel the need to have so many things on the back burner --- to get started on someday, instead of just doing what I want to do?  Why is it so dang hard for me to just be?

It just is.

As I work to slow my life down, I do feel more happiness. There are shining moments when I remember that I do not always have to accomplish. Where I just go with the flow and enjoy what is right in front of me. And those moments are beautiful things.

I want there to be more time like that, more times where I do not always have to be doing.

I am listening to the new voice in my head that tells me it is okay to linger, savor, and appreciate.

Maybe that is why I cannot seem to stop taking photos of the sunsets.